Friday, August 21, 2009

Breaking the Silence.

Hello Friends. Remember me? I am so sorry I have been such a horrible blogger these past few months. I am back at school now in Auburn. As I look back over the past 3 months and try to draw a general caption or explanation of the summer at KKountry, I get completely overwhelmed. The past few days I have been really searching and diving into His word to see how this experience of Kamp has changed or transformed me. What did I learn? How was I challenged? How did I impact the Kingdom? What did I learn spiritually?  I feel like when you throw these questions out after a 3 month long journey, it is difficult to come up with an answer. It's not even about me. So, I will just give you a gist of what the Lord has been teaching me. 

The most recent challenge the Lord has bestowed upon me comes from Colossians 3:1-3, "Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, SET YOUR HEARTS on things ABOVE, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. SET YOUR MINDS on things ABOVE, not on earthly things."  - I feel like most often this verse is used to focus on our minds and what consumes our thoughts. However, the Lord really pushed out the Heart part to me. Set my heart on things above... I am a very passionate person. When I meet people, have an idea, enjoy a sport, or experience something new, I am extremely passionate about whatever I am doing. Therefore, when something doesn't go right or change occurs, I am frequently left 'heart broken.' Seriously, the hardest part of coming back from Kamp was sincerely missing my friends. It wasn't just a mind thing, but my heart literally ached to not see these people every day. I have plenty of other examples of my heart achings, but I'll spare you. What I am trying to say is I never have thought about how I can set my heart on Christ. I must be 100 times more passionate about Him and knowing Him than about people or experiences. My heart must beat consistently with a love and desire to be in His presence. I realized that what I missed most in all these friends from Kamp was who Jesus is in them. I fell in love with Jesus living and breathing in my group of friends at kamp. The beautiful part about it is, if my heart is set on Him, then I am not actually heart broken when I get home because He never leaves me. I take Him back with me and suffer no loss. Of course, I'll still miss these people but the essential quality that I am drawn to is still living and breathing within me at this moment. That is how He establishes and desires community. He uses Himself to draw others together. My friend Hannah read me a quote that I really liked. It's not exactly the quote but it said something like this," It is a privilege to experience His glorious presence and herald that reality to others." What a beautiful picture of Jesus living and breathing in our lives and in the lives of those around us. 

As for Kamp, I have gone through my journal I kept during my time there. The main prayer that stuck out was the desire to know Jesus more. I didn't have a spiritual high or a huge lesson learned while I was at Kamp. I don't have many impacting stories that would wow you. I don't have any miracles or wonders to tell. I feel like this summer was a time where I "continued to work out my salvation with fear and trembling. For it is God who works in me to will and to act according to his good purpose." -Philippians 2:12-13  I feel like the Lord taught me alot about just being a servant and walking in His will for my life. At the end of the summer, I can truly say I am more intimate in my relationship with Jesus. I pray that He used me to love and minister to others. I pray that at the end of the day, HIS NAME was lifted high and glorified. I pray that He is working in and through the lives that were impacted at Kamp. 

More fun and interesting stories from Kamp coming soon. Stay tuned.