Thursday, May 7, 2009

Thoughts.

With such an emotional and draining week under my belt, I am sitting here just in need to type and let it out. The weekend consisted of my roommate coming home from Italy, my attempts to study for finals, birthday party, and absolutely NO sleep. Remember these days? Also, you would think I would be overjoyed with finals over and Summer at my feet, but I am not. I could strangely enough do another month of school to keep my community and friends around me. The hardest thing right now is starting the good byes and sending many people out of Auburn for good. With a roommate in New Zealand, sister in Asia somewhere, other roommate was in Italy, best friend in Wetumpka, etc. the Lord is really testing and shaping me in these times. It's cool to see His work in me start to be lived out. My roomie in N.Z., who happens to be one of my closest friends, has been used by the Lord to teach me such a valuable lesson. She and I weren't close in the first part of the Fall but grew to be best friends by the time she left. I still talk to her weekly and know about her life, her walk, and her growth. The Lord has strengthened our friendship in ways I didn't know were possible. I have been so encouraged by what she is doing and learning and becoming. He is consuming her EVERYTHING right now and it's a blessing to stand by and watch. I haven't seen her since we set her off in Feb. 

Here is what the Lord's teaching me:
I fully trust that He will allow my friendships that are meant to stay close and similar in structure, the same. I trust His provision. I will not stay close and in touch with everyone. As much as I want that, it's just not always His plan. I am convinced in that, that He is producing the good through those faded relationships. Example: I would not be the woman I am today if I had stayed close to some people that I would have chosen. He is way better at choosing my future and my relationships. Simultaneously, I have seen Him be faithful in the friendships that He has set consistent. I am still close with many of my friends from other seasons of life.  All that blabber to say that He is sovereign and I will trust HIM.

I trust Him with my relationships.
I trust Him with the future friendships in Auburn.
I trust Him with the lives of the people I love.
I trust His provision.
I trust what He would have.
I trust that I will stay connected to those planned in advance for me to and see the good in ALL things and change from here on out. 
I trust He is not finished with me yet in Auburn.
I trust He will answer many friends' questions and path directions.
I trust His word. In HIs word, all of these things are revealed.